Jose thinks…

I am not writing this entry to try to make Jose look stupid.  Stupidity is not his problem, lack of a formal education is.  When it comes to common sense, he could run laps around my book smarts.    I think these little “beliefs” of his are cute and worth mentioning.

*Once, he decided he was going to be the first astronaut to reach the sun.  I told him that was in no way even close to being possible.  It was way too far and he would be burnt to a crisp long before arriving.  Besides, I explained, the sun is just a big ball of burning gasses.  He then accused me of reading too much science fiction and of not having enough faith in him. 

*I was looking up stuff on Google Earth last night.  When you start, you’re looking at a globe.  He glanced at the computer and scoffs, “What is that?!  Why do they have the world all round and stuff?”  He totally thought I was teasing him when I told him the world is, in fact, ROUND! 

*He thinks tad poles swim up your butt and lay eggs in your stomach.  He won’t swim in lakes or rivers because of that fear.  Once, there was a baby catfish in the sand and Jose about had a heart attack thinking it was the biggest damned tadpole he had ever seen!!

*He went bald because he thinks too much.  Uh-huh.  Suuure.  He probably went bald from worrying about all those tadpoles!

*His belly button possesses the ability to breathe oxygen for him.  He thinks he can close his mouth and cover his nose and he’d still live because the air seeping in through his belly button.

LoL, okay… I have more but I have to stop now.  This is making him look really dumb!!    I’m sure you guys have some to share, though!!!